Watchman |
: (With a profound voice) |
|
Who are you, there. At the palace gate? |
Trickster |
: An honest man! I am coming from far away,
from over the seas and lands. |
Watchman |
: And why did you come here? |
Trickster |
: I am strolling on the long roads of the world
and now I am here in this vast and |
|
lonely land in winter time!! |
Watchman |
: And how? Are you coming with ill thought,
are you coming with ill intentions? |
Trickster |
: How on Earth!! Watchman!! I am strolling through
the world. Everybody knows me. |
Watchman |
: What's your name? |
Trickster |
: I am called Trickster - the Wag!!! I think
you have heard of me. |
Watchman |
: Of course! Why didn't you say it from the
very beginning? All the folks know you!! |
|
: (To the audience) You children, do you know
him? |
Audience |
: Yes!! |
|
: Or: No! |
|
: Or: Yes and No! |
Watchman |
: If you know him, enjoy yourselves! He is again
among us! |
|
: Or: You don't know him?
He is your friend, everybody's friend. |
|
: Or: for you, those who don't
know him, I will tell you that Trickster is |
|
: the best merry friend of
the children. |
|
: (To Trickster): I'll let
you enter the palace Trickster,but a great danger is menacing |
|
: you up there. |
Trickster |
: It doesn't matter to me at all! |
Watchman |
: the Blue Emperor is very sad because his daughter
can never marry. |
Trickster |
: I'll marry her. |
Watchman |
: Finding a possible groom is not the problem.
Plenty of brave, strong, young men like |
|
: you have tried to marry her but all of them
have failed. |
Trickster |
: I shall try too. It is worth trying. The trial
is not the death. |
Watchman |
: On the contrary. This trial means that you
run the risk of dying. Many princes and |
|
: knights who have tried have been smashed to
smithereens. Their corpses are now in a |
|
: common grave. Ninety nine Prince Charmings
have already died and if you enter, you |
|
: could be the hundreth. |
Trickster |
: How do you imagine that I will perish so easily?
Have you ever seen a dead devil? |
Watchman |
: Trickster!! Trickster!! God bless you!!! |
Trickster |
: Take it easy watchman!!! Mind your gate and
do not bother about me!! |
Watchman |
: Trickster, my boy!! I am speaking to you as
if you were my own child. I'd advise you |
|
: to turn back on your way into the wide world
though the Blue Emperor has ordered me |
|
: to hold any young man if he is of marrying
age. I am not to let him leave our land until he |
|
: tries his powers at the palace to break the
spell on the Blue Emperor's daughter. He is to |
|
: sleep one night in a room with the Bear and
to awake unharmed the next morning. |
Trickster |
: To turn back after such a long journey and go back
to where I cam from? Not a chance!! |
|
: Watchman!! Maybe destiny has directed me here, maybe
arriving here is my own good |
|
: fortune! |
Watchman |
: As you like, but my good nature induces me to warn
you! |
Trickster |
: Thank you very much watchman. I'll be very careful.
|
Blue Emperor |
: (His voice coming from backsage) Hey!! What's going
on there at the gate of the |
|
: palace? (Pause) Who is strolling on our lands? |
Watchman |
: (Whispering to Trickster) the Blue Emperor is coming!!
(Loudly to the Emperor) |
|
: . . . a poor man . . . he is asking for lodging
. . . |
Blue Emperor |
: Is he young? |
Watchman |
: . . . yes . . . no . . . he is . . . |
Trickster |
: I am called Trickster, Your Highness! |
Blue Emperor |
: Ha!! Ha!! Ha!! You don't say!! I have not heard
of you for such a long time until |
|
: today!! I thought you were already dead for at
least a century!! But it is not too late |
|
: to die tonight. |
|
: (To the Watchman) Open the gate! |
|
: (The watchman opens the gate, which makes a great
deal of noise from the heavy |
|
: and rusted bolts. The gate suddenly slams shut behind
Trickster and the bolts are |
|
: swiftly locked. Spear-carrying soldiers suddenly
appear and grab him. The Blue |
|
: Emperor's Machiavellian laughter is heard and then
the noise of swords being |
|
: drawn from their scabbards. The Blue Emperor and
his daughter are coming onto |
|
: the stage.) |
Blue Emperor |
: Ha! Ha! Ha! Your popularity will lower from now
on. You will make a mockery |
|
: of . . . yourself now! (He is pointing towards the
audience.) |
Watchman |
: Take pity on him, Your Highness! For pity's sake!
We all love Trickster, we love |
|
: him for his lovely jokes! Take pity on him!! |
Blue Emperor |
: That's it! An Emperor is supposed to have no mercy
for his underlings, otherwise they |
|
: will not obey any more. But I will give you a chance,
Trickster. If you take the risk and |
|
: remain alive after sleeping one night with the Bear
from the palace, I'll give my daughter |
|
: to you as a wife as well as one quarter of the entire
empire. (The watchman is crying.) |
|
: Tell me Trickster, do you dare to take the risk?
|
Watchman |
: Pay attention, Trickster! This Bear is not a usual
one. It is as giant as a mountain. The |
|
: Blue Emperor is keeping it in a cellar that is a
cold and damp grotto. He is eating a |
|
: man every night. The Emperor's daughter is sighing.)
|
Blue Emperor |
: Hey! You, watchman, accompany this undaunted young
man to the bear's grotto. And |
|
: don't forget. Tomorrow, in the small hours of the
morning do take and throw out his |
|
: bones so not to filth the air of the palace. |
Emperor's Daughter |
: Father, have mercy on him! He is such a stout fellow
with unrivaled features that |
|
: I have never seen until now! |
Blue Emperor |
: First of all, he must prove his bravery. I do not
give my daughter to the first |
|
: newcomer. |
Trickster |
: Your Highness, I want to ask something of you! |
Blue Emperor |
: Let's hear it! Speak! |
Trickster |
: Do lend me until tomorrow morning a bag with hot
pies and a bag with fir-wood splints. |
|
: A bag with nuts, a bag with stones and place in
a fifth bag a razor, mirror, soap a |
|
: shaving brush, a chopper and a number of deal boards
and pins. I'll try to do in the |
|
: Bear. |
Blue Emperor |
: Do give him what he wishes! Let's see! (The watchman
gets out into the side-scene and he |
|
: is coming back with five bags which he gives to
Trickster. ) And now, do accompany him |
|
: to his fate! (Trickster is pushed from behind with
spears off the stage to inside the grotto |
|
: where the Bear is kept.) |
|
(The grotto of the Bear. The stage is in a
shade of darkness. There are stalagmites and |
|
stalactites and a little water spring. A frightful,
giant, mangy bear is sleeping on a very |
|
large bed.) |
|
|
Trickster |
: (Singing) wake up, wake up you lazy bones!! |
Bear |
: (Sick and tired) I don't wake, I don't wake. I am
dropping with sleep. |
|
(Trickster noisily casts his bags to the ground.
The Bear is starting as if from a deep dream |
|
and he is looking at Trickster with large red
eyes. He is speaking to Trickster in an attempt |
|
to frighten him.) |
|
Grrrr! Grrrrr! Grrrrrr! (Threatening with his
great paws) Grrrr! (Trickster remains |
|
undaunted.) So! You are not frightened. All
others were fainting away in a swoon at the |
|
first sight of me. |
Trickster |
: How on Earth! I have just forgotten to get frightened. |
Bear |
: I beg you, do get frightened, otherwise the Blue
Emperor could get angry! |
Trickster |
: I have forgotten to get frightened, seeing you so
big and bulky. |
Bear |
: Honest? |
Trickster |
: Do not wonder about nothing! Stand up on two legs
when somebody enters your home! |
Bear |
: (Stretching himself lazily) Grrrr! Grrrr! Grrrr!
Who is that one who dares to oblidge me? |
Trickster |
: The politeness is obliging you. Do you want to be
considered an ill-bred from beneath the |
|
Earth? Good manners teach you to be polite
and respectful with unknown people. |
Bear |
: (The same play with his paws) Grrrr! Grrrr! Grrrr!
|
Trickster |
: Mind your place, mind your behavior! Behave yourself!
Tell me you haven't been ashamed |
|
to grow like that: pell-mell and uncontrolled?
Whom else have you seen looking like that? |
Bear |
: Shame? To me? What do you think? Let's make a contest
to see who will be the winner. |
Trickster |
: A contest, surely! Of course, a good idea. Let us
go into a contest to become friends |
Bear |
: How do you prefer: to fight with swords, with spears
or to struggle in a wrestling match? |
Trickster |
: I don't like those kinds of fighting! I don't want
any bloodshed even in a fight with a bear. |
|
Any dolt may win in a fight with a sword. We
shall fight with words. Let's see who is the |
|
cleverest!! (Pause) But wake up, you idler!
What's that! You are going to sleep at the |
|
same time as the hens!! What are you: a bear
or a masher? (The bear is looking in wonder |
|
at this little being who is speaking in an
unstintingly towards him.) |
Bear |
: (Ironically) Whom have I the honor of meeting? |
Trickster |
: Who am I? Only a stupid thing like you does not
know who I am! |
|
Let's see if you can guess! |
Bear |
: Maybe you are a Prince who has come here to marry
the Blue Emperor's daughter!!! |
Trickster |
: What kind of a Prince carries a bag? (He is laughing.)
The Blue Emperor's daughter!!! |
|
(The bear is standing up on two legs and he
looks like a very large rock ready to collapse |
|
over Trickster.) |
Bear |
: But I shall eat you just like that!! Grrrr! Grrrr!
Grrrr! |
Trickster |
: (Frightened, looking upwards to the bear but speaking
down to him) You, little bear! |
|
Behave yourself! First of all, do sit down
when you speak to me, you will get tired! |
|
(The bear sits down on the bed, no longer looking
like a giant. Trickster is breathing |
|
very hard, it seems that he is no longer frightened.)
|
|
Look here, I am caustic and I'll turn your
stomach if you eat me. Do you see these - (he |
|
is pointing towards the bags). I suggest that
you first of all taste a bit of pie with honey. |
|
I know that you are very fond of honey, abiding
the stings of a swarm of bees when you |
|
are caught at their hive. |
Bear |
: (Licking his lips) how I'd like that!!! |
Trickster |
: (Addressing the audience with an aside, so as not
to be heard by the bear): I shall give him |
|
a bag with splints. (Trickster throws a big,
tough splint from the bag with the splints while |
|
he is eating a pie from the bag with pies.
The bear is trying to eat the splint, trying very hard, |
|
forcing himself to gnaw at the splint but
he cannot so he is crying.) |
Trickster |
: You are not able to eat a pie!! And you dare to
compete with me!! Don't you? |
|
(The bear is discredited and goes to great
lengths to eat all the splints. Afterwards he begins |
|
to complain, holding his belly with his paws.)
|
Bear |
: Alas!!! My belly is hurting me!! My belly is hurting
me!! |
Trickster |
: What's the matter with you? What's hurting you?
Your belly is hurting you just from eating |
|
pies? |
Bear |
: (Pretending he is not hurt.)No!! Nothing hurts me!!
|
Trickster |
: This means that you cannot eat nuts, not a single
nut! |
Bear |
: That bag with nuts is not enough for me, I'll crack
them all with my large teeth. |
Trickster |
: You are only puffing yourself up. |
|
(Addressing the audience so as not to be overheard
by the bear) |
|
I'll give him the bag with the stones so that
he will crack his own teeth on them. |
|
(Trickster gives him the bag with stones.)
|
Bear |
: I'll crack the nuts with my teeth and not with a
hammer as you are doing. |
Trickster |
: O.K. !! If you think you are so stout!! |
|
(The bear is striving with all his might to
crack the "nuts", but he is cracking all his teeth |
|
instead and he is spitting them from his mouth
like glass beads.) |
Bear |
: Alas!!! I am now toothless, I have no teeth in my
mouth anymore!! |
Trickster |
: A few minutes ago you were saying that all my nuts
are not enough for your teeth but I |
|
see now that it is quite otherwise: all your
teeth were not enough for a single nut. You are |
|
not worth your salt. If you were living in
a forest with all the other bears, you would not |
|
survive, you would die of starvation. The
Blue Emperor is your luck, he is feeling pity for |
|
you and he is throwing you some leftovers
from his dinner as if you were a dog |
Bear |
: Are you insulting me? Do you dare to insult me?
|
Trickster |
: What has induced you into such a rage? Now, toothless
you cannot do anything to anyone |
|
any more. |
|
(Trickster is producing from a bag a razor,
mirror, soap and a shaving brush. He is fixing |
|
the mirror on a wall and he begins shaving
his face calmly.) |
Bear |
: What are you doing up there? |
Trickster |
: I am shaving myself to be smart and not covered
with locks like you. The Emperor's |
|
daughter will get frightened when she sees
you so ugly as you look just now. |
Bear |
: I love the Emperor's daughter very much. I have
killed all her suitors and that's why I'll |
|
kill you too. |
Trickster |
: I don't like the Blue Emperor's daughter and I don't
intend to marry her; she is too |
|
haggard and spoiled. I have come here to teach
you how to entrance her, how to behave |
|
yourself to give up your bad habits (meanwhile
he is finished shaving and he is showing |
|
his face to the bear.) |
|
Look at my cheeks, how smart I am!! |
Bear |
: (Admiringly) shave me, too!! |
Trickster |
: Do you think that you can support it? |
Bear |
: With great pleasure!! I want the Blue Emperor's
daughter to fall in love with me. |
Trickster |
: O.K.!! But do not grow angry. You have three inches
of long locks and it will be hard to |
|
shave them. |
Bear |
: Do, try!! |
Trickster |
: O.K.!! Be attentive now!! |
|
(He arranges two boards on the floor) |
|
Lie there! |
|
(The bear is lying on the boards, Trickster
is catching the bear's paws, two by two, with |
|
some other shorted boards.) |
Bear |
: But what do you intend to do with me? |
Trickster |
: You must stay motionless, like this was a surgical
operation. |
Bear |
: But the doctors use anesthetic, so that you do not
feel the pain. |
Trickster |
: Do not worry. I have thought of everything. |
|
(Trickster is pouring water on the bear and
then he makes soap lather all over |
|
Trickster takes the stick so that the lather
spreads all over the cave.) |
Bear |
: Alas!! What's going on here? Alas!!! |
Trickster |
: You have to be patient, I have to tease your fur
because it is too dirty and filthy. |
Bear |
: But I see that you are clubbing me!! |
Trickster |
: I do not club you, I am clubbing your fur to soften
it so as to more easily cut those locks |
|
of yours. Haven't you observed that men lather
their cheeks very well before shaving. |
Bear |
: (In a half voice) of course, I have seen them!!
|
|
(Trickster takes a great chopper out of a bag
and begins cutting the bear's great locks.) |
|
Alas! Alas! Alas! Grrrr! Grrrr! |
Trickster |
: Do not make such a hubbub, you could wake up our
neighbors. The Blue Emperor could |
|
hear it. |
|
(The bear is lamenting in a lower voice and
he is tossing around on the boards. After a |
|
while Trickster : ) |
|
I have grown tired. I am sure that you have
never shaved yourself in all your life and you let |
|
your beard grow since the day you were born.
|
|
(Trickster moves the boards, setting the bear's
paws free. The bear is hardly breathing.) |
|
Now, take this handkerchief (he gives him a
handkerchief) and defend me against the |
|
flies because I have toiled so hard for you.
I want to rest in your bed until tomorrow morning |
|
and you must see that no one disturbs me. |
|
(Trickster is lying on the bed and he falls
asleep lightly snoring. The bear looks very stultified |
|
and deploring, barely standing on his feet.
The light in the cave is growing slowly brighter. |
|
Dawn is coming. The bear is defending Trickster
with the handkerchief. Outside, one can hear |
|
the voice of the Blue Emperor and his daughter
lamenting.) |
Blue Emperor |
: Watchman, take Trickster's bones out of here and
throw them away, the air is filthy! |
Watchman |
: Immediately, Your Highness! |
|
(The watchman is coming in the cave rubbing
his eyes and creaking the door loudly.) |
Bear |
: (With his finger at his muzzle) quiet! Silence!
Mister Him is sleeping!! (He |
|
is pointing towards Trickster; |
|
(The watchman stumbles over a stalagmite and
falls down in surprise seeing the poor |
|
appearance of the bear.) |
Watchman |
: (Aside) What an apparition of a bear!! How could
Trickster make such a mockery of him? |
Trickster |
: Who is disturbing my rest? |
Bear |
: (To Trickster pointing towards the watchman.) Boss!!
He has fainted away when seeing how |
|
handsome I am!! |
|
(The bear is slapping the watchman's face with
his paws.) |
Watchman |
: Don't touch me with your paws, beast! |
Bear |
: (To Trickster.) He cannot believe his eyes how handsome
I am. |
Watchman |
: (Running quickly out of the cave and shouting) |
|
Your Highness!! Courtiers!! Do something quickly
to see the miracle!!! |
|
(They are all coming into the cave and are
astonished.) |
Bear |
: (Very proud of himself, speaking to Trickster.)
My beauty has taken their breath away. |
|
Grrrr! Grrrr! I am the most handsome bear in
the whole world!! |
Blue Emperor |
: To the devil! You are the most ugly!! |
Bear |
: (Smiling towards Trickster), they are not yet accustomed
to my new appearance. |
Blue Emperor |
: You! Get out of my palace! I need no more such frights.
You are stultifying me!! |
Emperor's Daughter |
: But father, do respect your own pledge to Trickster.
|
Blue Emperor |
: If I have taken this pledge that I would give him
my daughter as wife and a quarter of the |
|
whole empire, I must obey. |
All the courtiers |
: Hurray!! Trickster will live with us from now on!!!
|
Trickster |
: Your Highness!! I am very proud of the honor you
are granting to me, but I am not worthy |
|
of your daughter and your empire. My destiny
is to stroll free along the entire world, to |
|
help other people to get rid of troubles and
the evil which still exists. I cannot tarry in only |
|
one empire, the other will feel my absence.
(The Emperor's daughter is crying.) I am sure |
|
you will find another worthy bridegroom. I
am not looking for riches and power. I am |
|
content with my poverty and my freedom, I want
to be free as the birds in the sky. |
Watchman |
: Go away and be free and healthy, Trickster!! |
Blue Emperor |
: I am grateful to you, you broke the spell which
held my unmarried daughter. What |
|
will you do now? |
Trickster |
: Your Highness! I want to ask you to give me this
bear. I will teach him many things . |
Bear |
: (Starting eagerly), I am ready at any moment!! |
Trickster |
: To employ him in a circus so that he may greet with
his paws at his temple the children |
|
from all over the world, to do somersaults
and to walk on string. An itinerant circus will |
|
take him from country to country and when he
is an old bear, he will retire to a zoo with a |
|
well deserved pension. He is gifted and well
trained. |
Blue Emperor |
: I have the exact same thoughts as Trickster. |
Emperor's Daughter |
: Do come to us as well with your itinerant citcus!
|
Bear |
: Grrrr!! Grrrr!! Of course, surely!! |
Courtiers |
: Goodbye Trickster! See you later !! |
Trickster and the Bear |
: (Going away), see you later!!! |
Trickster |
: Bear! Do you believe in ogres? |
Bear |
: I believe that there are only drawn ogres in the
animated cartoons or ogres |
|
drawn by my father on the kites he used to
fly with a long string. We, all the |
|
bear cubs, were jumping up and down with joy
and our necks were hurting us |
|
because we were looking upwards to the sky.
|
Trickster |
: Alas! When you will see one in flesh and bones in
front of you, you will not look |
|
at him admiringly at all!! |
Bear |
: To meet a living ogre? |
Trickster |
: Just like that!!! |
Bear |
: The ogres were living once upon a time when it was
a milder weather, in the old |
|
fairy-tale stories and they died away at the
same time as the dinosaurs. |
Trickster |
: But, perhaps they have gone away to other planets.
|
Bear |
: Do you think that in those old times they were able
to build rockets and other |
|
flying objects? |
Trickster |
: Let's suppose that there was another civilization
before ours and it has destroyed itself. |
Bear |
: And that there are still survivors from that civilization?
|
Trickster |
: How could I know? I was not born in those times. |
Bear |
: The ogres have wings, don't they? |
Trickster |
: Those drawn on the kites or from the cartoons, have
wings. |
Bear |
: But let us speak seriously and not about toys for
children. (A noise of engines then a |
|
bright light as in full daylight.) |
Trickster |
: What time is it, Bear? |
Bear |
: (Producing a watch out of a pocket) It is midnight.
It should be the middle of the night |
|
but I see we are in the light of a summer day.
How strange!! It seems that the Sun has |
|
come down on Earth. We have just come out from
a dark wood and we are now on a |
|
brightly lit plain, it is like being under
a spell. |
|
|
|
(Sounds like radio signals are heard.) |
|
|
Trickster |
: It seems to me that there is a flying saucer. |
Bear |
: You are mocking me! I have never seen a saucer flying
by itself. |
Trickster |
: They are high flying saucers because they resemble
outer-space ships, or UFO's or whatever |
|
they are calling them. (A metallic stair is
lowered and a green living being with |
|
spectacles is coming down. The green outerspace
being - the outerspacer - has a |
|
robot-like voice.) |
Bear |
: Look at him, how green he is, as he is eating only
spinach like Popeye the Sailor man. |
|
An ogre with spectacles.what a puppet!!! |
Outerspacer |
: Zgri . . . gri . . . re . . . stri . . . tri . .
. ri.!! |
Bear |
: What language is the ogre speaking, Trickster? |
Trickster |
: I don't understand a word!!! Maybe they are speaking
a Chinese or German language. |
Bear |
: This is a mute ogre!! He does not know at least
one internationally spoken language, |
|
does he? |
Outerspacer |
: Cri po ri po ..... Cri po ri po . . . |
Bear |
: And besides all that he does not have the well known
mace. |
Trickster |
: Maybe he has forgotten it in the space-ship. |
Bear |
: Look, Trickster, the snow is melting under our feet.
And look how warm it is. I am |
|
perspiring all over as in the middle of a summer
day. |
Outerspacer |
: Ra re ri ro ru....Ra re ri ro ru . . . |
Bear |
: He is not the typical ogre!! |
Trickster |
: He has just arrived from the prehistoric times!!
|
Bear |
: (Protecting his eyes with his paw.) Look how many
little ogres there are in the flying- |
|
saucer. They are looking at us through the
sidelights. A young couple of ogres are |
|
dancing. How unseemly!! |
Trickster |
: I am sure they are considering it very pleasant.
|
Bear |
: BUT THERE IS SUCH FAIRY MUSIC, like from the other
planets. |
|
(The Outerspacer is coming near them. He is
of a smaller and thinner size than a man.) |
Bear |
: I am not afraid of any ogre, or para-ogre! If I
should hit him once with my paw he would |
|
crash down to the ground. How stupid I was
until now, my skin was shivering on me as |
|
soon as I was hearing their names. |
Trickster |
: Perhaps he is a dwarf ogre or somebody of their
kin. |
Bear |
: What a creature!! But he looks kind and decent. |
Trickster |
: I believe you, there are some kindhearted and well-bred
ogres. |
Outerspacer |
: . . . kindhearted ogres . . . |
Trickster |
: What did you say, Trickster? |
Trickster |
: I didn't say anything! |
Bear |
: I thought that somebody was mimicing me. |
Outerspacer |
: Mi . . mi . . cing . . . |
Bear |
: Trickster, have you heard, just now? |
Trickster |
: I have heard nothing, Bear! |
Outerspacer |
: . . . bear . . . bear . . . |
Bear |
: Alas!!! He is calling me! No! He is not calling
me! I am sick!!! I am hearing things! |
Outerspacer |
: . . . hearing things . . . I am hearing things
. . . |
Bear |
: You are hearing things too, Trickster! |
Trickster |
: The pity is that I have said nothing! |
Bear |
: But who has spoken before? |
Trickster |
: I do not know!!! |
Bear |
: But who was it that said: "hearing things .
. . I am hearing things "? |
Trickster |
: Me? You are out of your mind! I am not ill! |
Outerspacer |
: . . . ill . . . I am hearing things . . . |
Trickster |
: I am in good health, great guns!!! |
Outerspacer |
: . . . guns . . . guns . . . |
Bear |
: Trickster, I think that this green creature wants
to pop a gun, he wants to shoot us. |
|
(He is pointing towards the outerspacer.)..my
legs are melting..he wants to shoot |
|
us with a gun. |
Trickster |
: Remember well! You were boasting that if you could
only touch him . . . |
Outerspacer |
: . . . guns . . . guns . . . |
Trickster |
: Please, don't, we don't have any gun!!!! We are
pacificts! Do you understand? |
Outerspacer |
: . . . understand? . . . understand? . . . |
Bear |
: I don't want to have anything to do with such a
monster! A green . . . |
Trickster |
: This "ogre" is not a monster but a clever
being. He is even cleverer than you are. |
Bear |
: I don't believe it! |
Outerspacer |
: . . . believe . . . believe . . . believe . . . |
Trickster |
: Are you able to create such a flying space-ship
to fly quicker that the wind through |
|
stars and planets? |
Bear |
: I don't like flying in outer space. I feel myself
much better here where I am |
|
accustomed, here on the Earth. |
Trickster |
: How would you receive a visitor from Mars or from
the Moon? |
Bear |
: I would urge the dogs on him. |
Trickster |
: (Laughingly) Ha, Ha, Ha, and so you think that would
scare them? |
Bear |
: I would throw stones at him. I would threaten him
with a club. |
Trickster |
: And so! You would urge the dogs on him and you would
stand against the flying |
|
saucer with a club!!! It is advisable to be
hospitable with him and to make connection |
|
with these outer space beings. |
Bear |
: Who may know what kind of powers this ogre has hidden
in himself? |
Outerspacer |
: Who may know what kind of powers this ogre has hidden
in himself? |
Bear |
: Did you hear him? He has said it himself, he betrayed
himself. |
Trickster |
: Take it easy! Haven't you caught the idea? He is
learning our language. |
Bear |
: Look at him . . . How many aerial antennaes!!! An
ogre with aerial antennae!!! |
Trickster |
: This ogre is coming from beyond our world. Maybe
he is a scientific researcher |
|
or even a scientist on his planet. He wants
to study the life on Earth. |
Outerspacer |
: He wants to study the life on Earth. |
Bear |
: My Lord!! How quickly an ogre learns a foreign language.
I have tried very hard to |
|
catch the man's words and customs. And nobody
can say that I am a narrow minded |
|
bear. Yesterday, I bought a dictionary and
a handbook with the usual speech for |
|
conversations to get accustomed with the Shark's
and Octopus's language to make a |
|
connection with them, to ask them what is happening
in the seas and oceans of the |
|
Earth. I want to know if their emperor is still
the brown whale and who is the new |
|
commander of the Shark's army. I would like
to go to a party organized by the |
|
Jelly-fish ballarinas, by the Sea-Star fishes,
by the Sea-Horse fishes in the honor |
|
of the Princess Siren . . . |
Trickster |
: You are dreaming. Bear!! Remember, you do not know
how to swim. |
Outerspacer |
: Dri . . . bri . . . bear, you just do not know how
to swim! |
Bear |
: Word of honor!! (The Bear wants to clap the Outerspacer
on the shoulder but he is |
|
repelled with a jet of light.) Trickster, the
monster is charged with electricity - it |
|
has the power of lightning! |
Trickster |
: He is keeping you at a distance. Maybe he is an
outer space living being and not an |
|
Ogre as we are calling him. |
Bear |
: Then why has he disguised himself as an ogre? |
Outerspacer |
: . . . I guess your intentions . . . you not can
lie me . . . (He is using very poor human language.) |
Bear |
: Listen to him!!! He is just speaking now!! |
Outerspacer |
: (With a strange accent, distorting words.) Me .
. . understand all languages.use |
|
Telepathy . . . not listen with ears . . .
the brain understands . . . receiving waves, rays . . . |
|
emanated by your brain.I am speaking to you
not using mouth. |
Bear |
: O.K.!! |
Trickster |
: He has no mouth!! |
Outerspacer |
: Me without mouth. Me eat not. |
Bear |
: And you are not starving, are you? |
Outerspacer |
: I charge myself . . . with . . . solar energy. |
Trickster |
: This outerspacer is an immortal being!! |
Bear |
: How do you speak out the words if you are mouthless? |
Outerspacer |
: The loudspeaker is pronouncing the words. The cerebral
waves scanned by a |
|
miniature radio fixed in my nape and changed
into sounds perceptible to you . . . |
Bear |
: To say so, he has no ears!! What a creature!! |
Trickster |
: He has no eyes, too!!! |
Outerspacer |
: I need not eyes. |
Bear |
: And how do you see us? |
Outerspacer |
: Me . . . emanate radio infared rays in all directions.
They are hitting objects and come |
|
back bringing information. As the bats at night
maneuver their flying... |
Trickster |
: And thus, you are seeing us without seeing us!!! |
Outerspacer |
: Exactly so!! |
Bear |
: You cannot smell a ripe strawberry, or taste it,
can you? |
Outerspacer |
: I don't like strawberries or anything else. |
Bear |
: What a pity!!! It is no good to be an outerspacer!!!
Do you want to become an |
|
Earthling and to live with us? You are not
eating . . . as for drinking.at all. Do you |
|
sleep? |
Outerspacer |
: What is the meaning of "sleep"? |
Bear |
: To lie in bed and to shut your eyes . . . but, I
have forgotten, you have no eyes. |
Outerspacer |
: What? |
Trickster |
: To be out of work, I mean to stay motionless |
Outerspacer |
: I am out of work when I am out of order, on the
stocks and I am in major overhaul or in |
|
complete overhaul. We have come on Terra to
study the earthlings but I see the |
|
Earthlings are studying us. |
|
|
|
(Trickster and the Bear are laughing loudly.) |
|
|
Outerspacer |
: I understand not what you are speaking!! |
Trickster and Bear |
: We are not speaking, we are just laughing! |
Outerspacer |
: What is that? I can not laughing. |
Trickster |
: We will teach you, don't worry!! Do you want to
come with me and the Bear Jester |
|
to the puppets theatre to tell the children
customs from your planet, from your |
|
country? |
Outerspacer |
: Go, go; go, but you cannot beat outerspacer. |
Trickster |
: Whom to beat!!! You are so feeble that one knows
not what to beat!! Besides, you are |
|
made of iron sheets so, no one would dare to
hit you because he could hurt his hand or |
|
he could crash his bones. You have so many
wheels, aerial antennas, wires and pins . . . |
|
One may prick his . . . his fingers if he
would touch anywhere you. |
Bear |
: Trickster is a trainer, he has tamed and trained
many of my kin, he even tamed a dragon |
|
some days ago and now he was planning to tame
an ogre who is haunting somewhere |
|
over here. This ogre has his den in a cave
digged up under a rock on the peak of this |
|
mountain. |
Trickster |
: Much esteemed Outerspacer!! We are enlisting you
in our troupe and we wish you to |
|
become a cosmically renowned actor |
Outerspacer |
: (Addressing towards his teammate from the outer
spaceship.) Zbii, zbii, bri, pri, |
|
cri, thrii, zgri . . . (The U.F.O. is answering
with the same kind of sounds then it takes |
|
off. The bright light is lowering in intensity
till the flying saucer looks like a star far |
|
away and disappears. The warm and the frost,
the summer and the winter have changed |
|
places. The three are climbing up the mountain.
The Outerspacer is moving with a |
|
robotlike rattle, and he is rotating the aerial
antennas all the time.) |
Bear |
: Alas!! Trickster!! It is a fearfull frost!! |
Outerspacer |
: The frost does not exist, it is felt. |
Bear |
: You, one made of iron! Thank you!! |
Trickster |
: We'll take shelter in the first cave we find. |
Outerspacer |
: I shall not take shelter . . . cave . . . there
it is . . . humidity, all my devices get rusted and . . . |
|
they get out of order . . . |
Bear |
: Do you hear him? |
Trickster |
: Never mind!! You may stay outside and watch. (An
ogre is coming down from the peak |
|
of the mountain fluttering his wings.) |
Bear |
: Look up! A new Outerspacer!! It seems that he has
wings! . . . But where is his flying |
|
saucer? |
Trickster |
: (Ironically) Perhaps he wants to go on foot. Maybe
he is taking a walk through the |
|
galaxies. |
Bear |
: Alone? |
Trickster |
: Do ask him yourself!! |
Ogre |
: (Terrible) Who dares trespass on my private estate? |
Bear |
: (Cowardly) It is he who is questioning me!! |
Trickster |
: He is a real living (stressingly) Ogre!! |
Bear |
: Which private estate? |
Ogre |
: My private estate, which I am inheriting according
to my Uncle Horribleogre's |
|
will recorded at the public notary. Haven't
you seen the inscription: |
|
"NO TRESPASSING" (Silence) |
Trickster |
: Bear! Don't you hear what Mister Ogre is asking
you? |
Bear |
: I . . . I . . . I don't know how to read! |
Ogre |
: Do learn! (Nervously) go to school! You have grown
so great and you do not know the |
|
letters of the alphabet!!! |
Outerspacer |
: Og . . . Ogri . . . gri . . . ri . . . |
Ogre |
: (Pointing towards the Outerspacer) And who is this
dullard? Why is he dressed |
|
like that? Is he going to a fancy-dressed ball? |
Trickster |
: Do not grow angry Mister Ogre! I shall take care
of both of them. I invited them to |
|
accompany me in my travels. |
Ogre |
: And you are travelling on my estate, aren't you? |
Outerspacer |
: Trickster, you have promised to protect Outerspacer
from being beaten by Mister Ogre. |
Ogre |
: What are you mumbling about up there? You nincompoop!!
|
Trickster |
: He is an outer-space being. He has descended from
the sky with a flying saucer. (Then |
|
speaking at the Ogre's ear.) He was programmed,
I mean he was made as a robotlike |
|
toy, that kind of a toy with a key in its back
and which is moving alone when the key |
|
winds the spring. It was programmed to destroy
with his arms made of hard steel |
|
anything that he is meeting in his way!!! |
Ogre |
: You make me laugh!! |
Trickster |
: Do try and come near him!! |
|
|
|
(The Ogre tries but he is thrown back by a
blue lightning.) |
Ogre |
: Alas!! But it is not necessary to wrestle. I shall
throw my mace from 20 km. Far from |
|
here, and I shall crush his skull! |
Trickster |
: Which skull? He has no skull!! (The Ogre is in wonder)
and besides your mace is |
|
a primitive weapon no more in use nowadays.
They have invented bombs! (The |
|
Ogre is throwing his mace but the mace is repelled
as a boomerang and lands squarely in the Ogre's |
|
chest, knocking the Ogre to the ground.) |
Ogre |
: Alas!! What's going on here? I see coloured stars!!
|
Trickster |
: Take it easy, nothing too serious. Our Outerspacer
has returned the mace back to you. |
|
Perhaps you need it to crack nuts. It is good
for nothing else!! (The Bear is dancing.) |
|
|
|
(The bear is dancing.) |
|
|
Bear |
: He has done you in, dear Ogre!! |
Outerspacer |
: Outerspacer thank you very much for giving me your
mace, but I need it not. |
Trickster |
: (Ironically) Listen to him, Ogre! He is thanking
you. |
Outerspacer |
: Outerspacer is giving an iron ball to Ogre. (He
is producing from somewhere a large red |
|
ball.) |
Trickster |
: He is offering you a gift a . . . bomb. (Pointing
towards the red ball.) . . . in your head! |
Ogre |
: Nobody has vanquished me up till now. Who dares
to fight with me? (The Bear is just |
|
scratching his nape with his paw.) Maybe Bear? |
Bear |
: I . . . I do not fight anybody!!! It is not suitable
with the good manners. My |
|
schoolmistress will give me a bad mark for
bad behavior. |
Trickster |
: (Ironically) You are right! The Bear has the most
distinguished manners. And he is not |
|
degrading himself in such a plight to sully
his little paws with your blood! |
Bear |
: I am as clean as a pussy-cat. |
Outerspacer |
: And he is as brave as a pussy-cat, too! |
Ogre |
: But who is there to face me? Perhaps you, Trickster?
|
Trickster |
: (In wonder) I have no desire to fight. You are a
nice little Ogre. But you have hurt our |
|
feelings, Mister Ogre. We thought of you as
a decent Ogre |
Bear |
: (To Trickster) Where have you ever seen a decent
wild beast? |
Ogre |
: I am eager to crash someone to the ground. (He is
stretching in a rage.) |
Trickster |
: Behave yourself! We have no time for jokes. Look
here, if you are eager to fight, we |
|
allow you to have a fight with our Outerspacer.
We are in a hurry to climb you on the |
|
glass rock. |
Bear |
: Uncle Outerspacer, do throw that ball at him once
and for all! (The Outerspacer throws |
|
the ball. The Ogre catches it but it lets it
down immediately.) |
Ogre |
: Alas! It has burned my fingers. It was burning like
fire. |
Bear |
: run away, it might explode. It could make thousands
of splints out of you. |
Outerspacer |
: The ball won't explode. It is a toy for children
to play with in kindergarten. |
Trickster |
: I have taken away its detonator. It can no longer
explode. |
Ogre |
: It was scorching, incandescent . . . you, man .
. . or robot . . . or whatever you are!! |
|
|
|
(The Ogre is swooping down on the outerspacer
with his sword, but the sword |
|
bursts into pieces.) |
|
|
Outerspacer |
: YOU CANNOT KILL ANYBODY'S THOUGHTS. |
Ogre |
: Let me take my hunting rifle. |
|
(He is shooting but the outerspacer does not
even stagger.) |
Bear |
: Trickster, since when do the ogres have rifles?
|
Trickster |
: They have evolved too. |
Bear |
: And who are those who are selling them weapons?
Or do the ogres have a weapons |
|
industry? |
Trickster |
: During Peter Ispirescu's time with his wonderful
fairy tales, neither |
|
ogres or dragons knew anything about guns,
bombs, planes or submarines |
|
remember? Prince Charming came from beyond
our world on the wings of a giant bird |
|
which was ready to swallow him out of joy because
he had rescued his chick from |
|
death. |
|
|
|
(The bear makes signs that he remembers.) |
|
|
|
If in those times there would have been planes
or rockets Prince Charming would |
|
have been riding in a plane or a rocket. He
would have sat comfortably on a chair with |
|
his head back and a glass of lemon juice in
front of him . . . |
Outerspacer |
: Mr. Ogre is vainly striving, the ideas do not die
. |
Ogre |
: Perhaps I haven't taken the correct aim . . . I'll
try once more . |
|
(He takes aim and shoots but the cartridge
explodes in the rifle |
Trickster |
: Give it up, you little ogre! |
Outerspacer |
: Me . . . I am living in your imagination. NOBODY
CAN DESTROY FANTASY. IT |
|
IS IMPOSSIBLE. |
|
(The outerspacer disappears like a haze.) |
Bear |
: How quickly he has disappeared, hasn't he? Like
a ghost. |
Outerspacer |
: Alas!! You, ogre!! Do kill the people's fantasy
if you can!!! |
|
(The ogre is swooping towards the voice.) |
Trickster |
: Do catch the outerspacer ogre!! Look out, he is
over there!! |
|
(He is pointing with one hand towards one side
of the stage and with the other in |
|
the opposite direction. The Ogre is staggering.) |
|
Very well!! |
Outerspacer's |
: I am waiting for you Ogre!! |
voice |
|
Ogre |
: (To Trickster) Where is it hiding? . . . come on,
where are you, ghost!!! |
Trickster |
: How is it? You don't see him do you? Look over there!
(The same play with his |
|
hands.) Grasp him, Ogre!! |
|
(The Ogre is flummoxed. He is running from
one side of the stage to the other.) |
|
If you had not run so quickly, maybe you would
have caught him!! |
Bear |
: What a flummoxed Ogre!! |
Outerspacer's |
: Destroy the ghost Ogre!! |
voice |
|
Ogre |
: Alas!! I shall kill him! (He got dizzy.) |
Bear |
: (To Trickster) What a plight he is in now!!! |
Ogre |
: Stop where you are ghost!! |
|
(To Trickster) Where is he? |
Trickster |
: There, in the same place!! (The same play with his
hands.) Quicker |
|
(The Ogre is falling down, finished.) |
Trickster |
: Lock him in handcuffs Bear! |
|
(The Ogre cannot stand anymore. The Bear is
locking the Ogre's hands in cuffs.) |
Ogre |
: What? What are you doing to me? |
Bear |
: What a farce!!! An Ogre put in jail!!! The Prince
Charming would have simply |
|
cut off his head. |
Trickster |
: We have the duty to bring him to trial and only
if the judge issues a death verdict |
|
will a firing squad carry out the execution
and the Ogre will be shot dead. |
Bear |
: the world will be rid of Ogres!!! |
Trickster |
: We have to fasten him to a rock and then run into
the Ogre's palace to phone the |
|
Police to come and take him in for questioning,
so that he will answer for his |
|
deeds. |
|
(The Bear is fastening the Ogre to a rock and
then he and Trickster are moving off |
|
the stage. They come back after awhile. The
siren of a police car is heard coming. |
|
Trickster and Bear are seen coming down from
the peak of the mountain. They are |
|
singing.) |
|
|
Trickster |
: I am Trickster - the famous! |
|
All the world I want to stroll!
Refrain 1 |
|
I am Trickster - the famous! |
|
And I want to help you all!!! |
|
|
Bear |
: And I am the bear Jester |
|
What could scare me? Nothing! Refrain
II |
|
Trickster is my only master |
|
And I am walking on string! |
|
|
Both |
: Lonely wandering |
|
The entire world |
|
With spurred boots |
|
I don't feel cold! |
|
|
Trickster |
: (Refrain I) |
Bear |
: (Refrain II) |
|
|
Both |
: Lots of children, spright and gay |
|
Come to see him on the stages |
|
Of the puppets theatre play; |
|
Trickster, a joy for the little ones in ages!
|
|
|
|
(The curtain is falling down. Trickster is
still |
|
heard singing Refrain I |